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By: Clive Hook
To influence people means using behaviours to affect their thinking, feeling and actions so that they think, feel or do something which they would not otherwise have done. In social situations you might smile or wave and cause someone to respond. In business this influencing is more likely to be in the form of meetings, negotiations, presentations and conversations - particularly where there is a problem to be solved or a decision to be made.
Influence by design, not by chance or accident, should be the aim of the skilled practitioner or conversation controller. The skills and disciplines of Behavioural Intelligence build on the core skills of Emotional Intelligence and help skilled negotiators, leaders and managers to elegantly and subtly take charge. This is not limited to positions of authority. We teach meeting facilitators and meeting attendees these skills so that they can make meetings more valuable and worthy of the investment of time and resource.
The four quadrants of Goleman's Emotional Intelligence model include:-
Self Awareness - Having the ability to recognise the emotions you feel and the effects they have on you in different situations.
Self Management - Controlling your emotions and impulses and adapting to changing circumstances.
Social Awareness - Your ability to notice, understand, and respond to others' emotions and the effects these have on their behaviour.
Relationship Management - Your ability to build constructive working relationships.
The first two quadrants are about you and your internal management system. The second two quadrants are about how you operate in the presence of others. Behavioural Intelligence is firmly founded in all four quadrants but shows itself most readily in the Self Management and Relationship Management areas. Here the interaction is with others in the form of things you say or do - that's what behaviours are. Behaviours can be verbal or non-verbal, a statement or question or a facial expression.
Behavioural Intelligence means taking charge of your brain and that means being able to interrupt your reflexes or impulsive responses (probably from your amygdala or limbic system) long enough to choose an alternative behaviour (using your prefrontal cortex). Having a name for the behaviour or a mental map which gives names or titles to behaviours within conversations means you increase your speed of choosing. It is generally thought you have about 0.6 seconds to consciously affect your behaviour so there isn't much time. Your prefrontal cortex works best when it has a labelling system to work with. The models and descriptions of behaviours together with the conversation control map put you and your pre frontal cortex in charge -so your interactions with others are more deliberate, more purposeful and more powerful. If you want to consistently be more effective and have more personal impact and influence you need to learn and develop your Behavioural Intelligence skills.
Author Resource:->??Clive is co-owner of ClearWorth , specialising in bespoke manager, leader and team development for organisations all over the world. Clive lives in the UK and France and has worked in 26 countries in the last 10 years from Ohio to Oman, London to Lagos, Surrey to Syria. Clive thinks, teaches and writes about negotiation, influence, interpersonal relationships and cross cultural communication.
Article From Niche Articles Live
Source: http://nichearticleslive.com/Art/185513/24/Behavioural-Intelligence-Taking-Charge-of-Your-Brain.html
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